About me:
Well, for one my name is Tim.I am from Houston, Texas. My best friends are Brittany and Talena. Click on their picture on the right to be wisked away to there pages. Well leave a comment and let me know what you
think! Remember to alway have fun, make friends, and find and advnture!!
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Recently:
Back In Houston
2007-11-23
Sioux Falls Update
2007-09-11
Starting LIfe over
2007-05-27
Starting LIfe over
2007-05-27
Starting LIfe over
2007-05-27
TO: Nathan
2006-02-27 -
3:42 p.m.
Last night you sat down and talked with me. There are a lot of things you said that I have been processing.
Some of these things I do understand and I do feel where you are coming from on some of these issues. You talked about how deep down you felt you were not reaching your goals? My question to that is this, what are your goals? I know you want to go back to school and do all these things that you want to do and by no means am I going to stop you. Yet when we were talking about moving back to Texas you seemed unsure on rather or not you wanted me to come with. Nathan I will not ask you if I am wasting my time because my time is my time and how I spend it is never wasting my time. Whenever I look at something, I ask myself, is it worth it? My time here has always been worth it. Sure there may have been a little drama but nothing that doesn�t come with life.
You right now I am feeling I need to clear some things up. For one when I say �I am being patient� that comes with a lot of meaning behind it. For one it means that you are lacking in some areas and I am being patient with them. For example if I feel that you are keeping me at arms link, I stand back and I am being patient with you. I do not want you to feel that I am pressuring you into opening up to me. For another example, sex; that is a big thing to me. What I look for in a guy is someone who is aggressive, someone who knows what they want and they go and get it. Once again, I am being patient in this area. You just don�t come off aggressive enough to me. I look for someone who has passion and who can come and show me what they want.
Nathan what I think the base line problem is that we both have strong views that are totally different from each other. I respect your views and try my hardest to be polite when crossing those issues. Yet I feel that you are not trying to see things from my perspective. I am a simple person who just needs simple things to make me happy. I do not need anything extravagant, glorious, or expensive. Little things like coming home and just holding me makes me happier than anything else.
I have taken notice to the fact I am always telling you that the answer is �holding me�. I think I should elaborate on this a little more. Holding me gives me that feeling of protection from the world. If you were to see me upset about anything just by holding me and allowing your emotions to say �I am here for you� will get me to establish that connection you were asking for last night. I can pick up on your emotions and I will know that you are there for me. The words alone are not enough to convince me.
Another thing is communication; you keep asking me, what do you want? I keep responding with �I don�t know�. Well that is not completely true. All I ever really want is to make you smile, to be there for you, for you to hold me. I do not care for much else. I am very passive and I think that is driving you up a wall. Nathan what I think on this issue is this; I am always achieving my goals no matter where I am at. How I get to my goals is of no concern to me, just getting there with those three things is all I really do care about. I am not a picky person when it comes to most things and it brings a frown to my face when you get frustrated because I won�t tell you what I want. All I want is just to be there with you. There are some areas that I would like you to work on but I am a very patient person. Patient meaning that I am willing to wait till you acknowledge the issue and work on it. Nathan first and foremost you just have to accept me for who I am. I am a kid with a lot of emotional issues that I am working on. I have calmed down a lot since moving here. Now instead of doing a whole bunch of crazy stuff, I am content with just chilling on the couch and falling asleep while you watch Sopranos.
Nathan what I need to know first and foremost is if that down the road you want to go your own way. I need to know now so I can start planning. I don�t want you to leave me but I am not going to stop you either. The only real way to get to know me is listen carefully when I am expressing what I want outside those three things. For example, when I kept asking you to rub me down, I did have alternative motivates. I was going to show you all my �hot spots� and what I look for. It was suppose to be educational while fun at the same time. I was more disappointed that I was trying to reach out in my own way and you just kind of blew me off. I guess the type of person I am is that I am always trying to surprise people. Sometimes I ask you to make small little leaps to at least meet me half way although I am going to try to start meeting you on your end because the way I am trying to go about things really isn�t working for either of us and I am sorry.
Well I guess that is it for now. This is a really long letter. I hope this helps explain things a little more.
Love Always,
Tim
